It has been so long since I have been here to post. I have sat at my desk and stared that the blank computer screen many, many, many times but nothing came. Others have ask me to post about various subject, mainly the She Speaks conference and I promised I would once I had take time to process all that I learned that weekend. However, as I began to step back in time in my mind to July 29-Aug 1st I realize that there were piece to my puzzle still missing.... questions still unanswered... dreams still unconfirmed. I have just felt undone since those days in North Carolina. I left my house on Thursday the 28th fill with self assurance that I was going to meet God to recieve my "marching orders". That I was ready to run into the fire as others would be running out. When I stepped into the Embassy Suites in Concord NC, I realized that I was going to be rudely awakened.
My eye opening first came in the Friday night General session when Lysa Terkeurst told the tale of two cities. The cities that fought for year and final City A decided to take up all their garbage and dump it over the wall to City B. In turn City B want to bring peace between the two so they gathered up all their treasures and tossed it over the wall to City A. My heart was broken at that point. I became so aware that daily I had been dumping my garbage on God and He just continued to hand treasures back to me. I have even come to expect His treasures and yet I have never really offered Him anything but my leftovers, the things I didn't need or want anymore.
I feel the same way since She Speaks. I am also doing a bible study that is cutting to the quick. Between the two, I'm not sure what I'm doing. Undone is the perfect word for what I'm feeling. It's comforting to hear that I'm not alone. For me, I think that God is just asking me to empty all of me for all of Him. I'm struggling. I thought She Speaks would be amazing, and it was...but really God is the amazing one and He has a plan. I can't wait to hear it. I'm praying for you, my friend.
ReplyDeleteAndrea
www.andrea-justhangon.blogspot.com
No lesson that weekend was in vain, my friend! Can't wait to see ALL He does...big and little in your sweet life!! Meeting you was a blessing :)
ReplyDeleteYou've reminded me I need to go back over my SheSpeaks notes...I don't want those lessons to fall by the waist side and not be lived out!!
hugs to you~ Mariel
I am so, so, so, so glad we got to meet in person, Amy! You are positively delightful...genuine, friendly, beautiful inside and out. :)
ReplyDeleteI have only been by a few other blogs of She Speaks attendees, but what amazes me are the different things that really touched or spoke to each woman. God is so amazing.
I didn't leave with specific marching orders either. Very much a heart undone...which truly is a good thing. A tearful thing. But good. I needed it. :)
Praying for you tonight. I know He is so pleased with your love for Him, with your desire to make Him known. You delight Him, Amy. Never forget it.
Hugs,
K